sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
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