butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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