Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize