brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
