Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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