do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
No subtext here. People are naked.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
