I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
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