Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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