i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
