we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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