U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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