oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Threesome in a minivan. New low
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
