big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Boobs speak an international language.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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