Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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