I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize