Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
