her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
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