This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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