Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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