If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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