I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
