so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
she told me i tasted like america
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
