maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
