My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
