New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
