remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
itβs about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize