Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize
