Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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