Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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