Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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