break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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