If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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