Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
