pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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