lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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