My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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