The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
