turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Randomize
