if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
