life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
