You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
