Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
