im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Randomize
