he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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