normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
