I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
