Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Be still, my beating vagina.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
It's official drugs can't kill me
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
