I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
