I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize