I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
PANTIES FOUND
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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